You Can Have What You Want
When I first started really decluttering my own home, I knew why I was doing it. I wanted to feel less disorganized. I had tried organizing for years but the effects of my efforts were usually short lived. Then one day I realized what I needed was just less stuff to keep track of. The second reason I wanted to purge my belongings was a need to feel that our home was spacious, delightful and elevated. The intention I set was to create a beautiful, functional sanctuary for my family.
Sometimes I ask my clients this before we start decluttering, “What is your vision for a particular space?” Or, “How do you want to feel when you are in your home?” By starting with the motivation, we can create a intention that we can keep coming back to while we are decluttering. When we get stuck along the decluttering journey, we can re-ask ourselves the question and listen again to the answer.
For example, I have a client who really wants to go minimalistic. She feels that it is good to have only just what one needs in order to live a nice life. She doesn't want clutter. She wants to walk softly on this earth making as little impact as possible with her purchases. So when she came across 5 pairs of jeans that she had not worn since the beginning of the pandemic, she asked if she would need them in five months from now. She asked me, how many jeans does a person need. I couldn't answer that for her.
I asked her, “What do you want?” From there, it was easy for her to let go of her jeans, all but one pair, because she could no longer fit into them and really didn't want to worry about losing weight. She knew that she was enjoying simple, comfortable clothes during the pandemic and wanted to create a signature wardrobe that made dressing simple and easy and sophisticated. She could let go of not only the jeans, but keep only what fit into her vision for her wardrobe. It has been a bit scary for her to let go of things that she paid money for, but the reward for her comes everytime she looks in her newly cleaned out closet that now reflects her vision. The new closet then become reconfirming of her intention so that when she moves onto the next area, she wants to feel that sense of accomplishment again.
What my client wants is to let go of things because she wants to experience and promote a good life lived with very little. That's her motivation but it isn't everyone's motivation. The point is, that by tapping into her unique intention, she can feel at ease letting go of things that do not serve her highest vision of living in a very simple, functional, sustainable, and beautiful home.
Exercise: Creating an Intention
Envision yourself with the keys to your home in you hand and you are standing at the threshold of your home. Notice what you feel like as you are standing there? Where are you coming from? Are you stressed, excited, sad? What kind of space do you crave in this moment? How do you want your home to hold you?
Now visual opening the door and and taking a step into your home. In this ideal vision of your home, what do you notice about your house? What does it smell like? What temperature is it? What do the floors feel like? Do you want to take off your shoes? What sounds do you hear? What does your body feel like? What is the visual field like? Is it filled with delightful creative projects beckoning you to work on them? Is it a clean slate waiting for you to cook a meal? Or is filled with pets who run to greet you? Is there a space in this home for your belongings? For you? What is your favorite part of your home? Add other questions here.
Once you have a vision, a good feel, for what you want for and from your home, look around your existing home. What is one place in your home that feels off to you? What is one place you would like to bring some energy or change to? Start there. When you get stuck, take a break. Come back to your vision, to your intention. Take a long break if needed. Transformation takes time. I believe we can all uncover what we want and live the home life that we desire. Try it and report back. You deserve to live in a home that feels nourishing to you.
The intention I set for my own decluttering efforts was to create a home best suited for our family's needs and wants. I truly believe that by working hard on purging what didn't serve my intention, I created space for a new house to 'arrive in my inbox'. Sometimes the magic of decluttering is uncovering possibility. Now that I am in our new home, my intention is to keep maintaining and creating a space where I do not lose my keys.